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Friday, 12 September 2014

You're flying low, you idiot.

Let me just start off with saying I ain't a pilot.
I didn't know the lingo. 
I was innocent, frail.
Yes, today we shall talk about the first time someone told me my fly was open.
For those not familiar with this term, it is when you don't zip up the zipper on your jeans. Fun stuff, I know.
It was back in grade five, and me being the idiot I was (Oops sorry did I use past-tense?) IS, I said
"What? I'm not flying?!"
And of course they were repeating the term as if i'd know it, and all I'd do was repeat the fact I was not in a plane. Not to mention me squatting to make myself shorter..
WHY IS THIS NOT WORKING?! I AM NOT A FREAKING PILOT!
In the end they proceeded to point at the gate to one's lady gardens, something one would rather not hear about. So I zipped up my jeans, and felt like I was an airplane the entire day.
The worst part of it is, I didn't even get to fly...
...So next time someone says you are rather close to the runway, remember, you're not flying.
You just gotta close the door.
This message was sponsored by the International Association Of You-didn't-get-the-lingo Victims.

(P.S For you lovable gullible people, it's not real, don't look it up.)


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