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Monday, 30 June 2014

Embarrassment is my weapon.

I find that I am the most awkward person to be around when you don't know me. These are my symptoms:
Voice-gets-incredibly-low-like-a-man
Muttering-that-makes-me-sound-like-Gollum
Very-Strange-Hybrid-Shuffling
And if I were to meet someone new, and I had all these conversation starters, it would probably go a little like this:
Stranger: Hi.
Me: I almost died on a ski hill once.
Stranger: What's your name?
Me: Mnike
Stranger: Sorry what?
Me: Mow-Nique?
Stranger: Sorry what? Meneque?
Me: Uh, Menek?
Stranger: Oh, Menek!
Me: (Already giving up) Yeah, sure.
Stranger: What's your last name?
Me: Vigneault
Stranger: ViƱoo?
Me: Uh, yeah.
Stranger: Is it spelt V-I-N-I-O?
Me: *Throws dictionary at stranger*
In conclusion, I am probably some kind of an alien near strangers judging from the symptoms.

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